Day 19: TemptationProverbs 6:27-29 Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned? Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched? So is he who goes in to his neighbor's wife; none who touches her will go unpunished. Dads, it is good to warn your children about poison oak: “See that oily bush, son. That’s poison oak. Leaves of three, let it be.” Yet what if you weren’t sure what poison oak looked like? You might carelessly walk right into it and lead your children through it also. Or else you might be overprotective: “Don’t touch anything green!” Your children would go through life petrified of nature. Yet even more importantly, you must warn your children against temptation. Warn them what to watch out for and what to do when they are pressured. If you do not instruct them, someone else will.
Solomon, for example, warns his son about . . .
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Day 18: DiscontentmentProverbs 11:28 Whoever trusts in his riches will fall, but the righteous will flourish like a green leaf. My wife once traveled to Arizona and asked my son what he wanted for a gift.
He replied, “I’d like a snake.” (We were reading Genesis and his favorite Bible character was the serpent.) So I asked him, “You mean like a pretend snake.” “No,” he insisted, “A real snake.” Needless to say he was disappointed (for about three seconds). We all experience disappointment in life, so Paul explains the key of contentment . . . Day 17: DeceptionProverbs 12:22 Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are his delight. Children often lie for fear of discipline. My son once blamed his brother for drawing with chalk on the neighbor’s driveway, so I had to explain that his deception concerned me more than his colorful scribbles. “Tell me the truth,” I told him, “You won’t be disciplined for your artwork, but only if you lie to me.” Tearfully, my son confessed his sin and sought his brother’s forgiveness.
In biblical times . . . Day 16: SpeechProverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits. While reading The Pilgrim’s Progress as a family, we came upon the characters Faithful and Talkative. “What is Talkative’s personality?” one son asked.
“He talks a lot,” I answered, “Do you think that’s good or bad?” Thinking for a moment, he replied noncommittally, “Well, he could be a pastor.” Day 15: LazinessProverbs 6:6 Go to the ant, O sluggard; Consider her ways, and be wise. The first week after bringing home a newborn is always difficult. For one of our boys, my wife woke up every two hours to nurse and woke me up as well to share in her misery. My job was to lift our son from the bassinet, hand him to my wife, then fall asleep until it was time to replace our bundle of joy. (I’m convinced that caring for a newborn is a kind of sleep torture to condition parents for the rigors of childrearing.) After just a few of those evening exercises, I became so disoriented when my wife woke me that I would have to ask, “Coming or going?” Thankfully, after the first couple weeks, my wife realized that I was not an essential cog in the late-night feedings. (I had figured that out much earlier, but was wise enough not to verbalize it.) I slept so soundly during that first night of uninterrupted bliss that I asked her the next morning, “Oh, did he sleep through the night?” My wife was not at all amused.
Day 14: AngerProverbs 16:32 Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city. Children often breathe their parents’ second-hand anger. At my son’s back-to-school night, I noticed one student’s artwork with the entire page scribbled in red crayon.
The teacher asked, “What’s that a picture of?” The little boy answered, “It’s my daddy. He’s really, really mad.” Day 13: AnxietyProverbs 12:25 Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad. I was lost, driving through an unfamiliar neighborhood when my GPS died. I looked around my car, but could not locate a single map. (Yes, there was a day when maps were made of paper.) Since I get anxious when I don’t know where I’m driving, I began to feel a headache and a terrible feeling in my stomach. I was also running low on gas and late for an appointment. Then I had a second appointment after that one, which I would probably miss as well and have to pay late fees. My fear started spinning out of control. Then, at that moment, another car blocked my lane . . . .
Day 12: FollyProverbs 22:15 Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him. Your child is a fool. I hate to break it to you, but your child is a wisdom-rejecting, common sense-shirking, God-denying fool. One night, my sons devised a new game called America’s Greatest Talent which required training in their bedroom when they should have been asleep. Course challenges involved scuttling the bookshelf and scaling the bunk bed (without the ladder, of course). The greatest talent was to leap from the top bunk and land on a pillow the size of a postage stamp just inches from the wall (all this in the dark). I walked in on them and found it mildly amusing, but my wife was appalled. Like most parents, we cannot count the number of times we have spoken with shock: “What in the world were you thinking?” Dads, teach your children wisdom, for they are foolish by nature: “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him” (Prov. 22:15). Young fools, unless instructed wisely, will soon become older fools who remain blind in their sin.
Day 11: PrideProverbs 16:18 Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall. Occasionally, you may read a bumper sticker boasting: “I am the proud parent of an honor student at such-and-such school.” Your prideful response may either be, “Psssh! My child is smarter than yours” or “Why don’t you just keep that to yourself.” I’ve even seen the bumper sticker rebuke: “My kid can beat up your honor student.” Pride is one of the greatest pitfalls in parenting (Prov. 16:18), for we usually see pride in others before we see it in ourselves. We blindly believe that proud people must be boastful, yet arrogance need not be flamboyant. Boasters express their pride aloud, while the bashful keep it in. You can be quiet and reserved but still be sanctimonious or you might be like whiny Moses (Exod. 4:10-14a) instead of hardhearted Pharaoh.
Day 10: Planting SeedsProverbs 4:11-12 I have taught you the way of wisdom; I have led you in the paths of uprightness. When you walk, your step will not be hampered, and if you run, you will not stumble. My wife once planted a vegetable garden and, every day, she would water her tomatoes, pull out weeds, and watch for predatory worms and snails. She trained her tomatoes to climb a trellis and tenderly drew them back if they were turning one way or the other. That’s a picture of parenting as an everyday process. One of our sons went through a phase requiring discipline multiple times a day (often for the same offense). It was exhausting to deal with the tantrums, deception, and defiance. But one day at the breakfast table, my sons commented that I hadn’t had to discipline them all year long. That claim was not entirely accurate, but the moments had thankfully grown fewer and farther between.
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