Day 24: ObedienceProverbs 1:7-8 The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction. Hear, my son, your father's instruction, and forsake not your mother's teaching. When my son started second grade, I asked him what he had learned in school and his answer was intriguing. He said his teacher was instructing them how to be second graders. Curious, I asked, “What does that mean?” He replied with his chest puffed out: “In first grade we just had to listen, but in second grade we also must remember.” That is a good lesson for all of us. We must not merely listen to God’s Word, but also remember and obey (Jas. 1:22). Unfortunately, fathers your little rebels often find obedience to be difficult.
Late one evening . . .
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Day 23: LoveProverbs 15:17 Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it. Raising children requires a foundation of love. Hall-of-Fame baseball player Harmon Killebrew once shared how, as a child, he destroyed the lawn fielding grounders with his dad. When his mother commented on the trampled grass, his dad replied, “Honey, we’re not raising grass here. We’re raising boys.” Similarly, Proverbs 15:17 explains, “Better is a dinner of herbs where love is than a fattened ox and hatred with it.” Dads, even if your mouth waters over a really juicy steak, it is still better to chew on salad surrounded by a loving family. Your kids rarely need more stuff, but they do need your love. Labor to build a relationship with your children because all the money in the world can fill your house with things, but it cannot make a family.
Love your children with your time by remembering four basic words . . . Day 22: Disciple-MakingProverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it. One day, my son asked me why I still had children. It was an oddly-phrased question, so I asked him to explain: “What else would I do with my children?”
He suggested, “You could sell them.” I replied jokingly, “I don’t think I could get very much for them.” So he insisted, “I think you could get $6 million for each of your children.” A little quick math: That’s $24 million (much more than the cost to raise them). Yet unfortunately dads, we cannot sell our kids, so it’s time we learned to parent them. Day 21: MarriageProverbs 5:18 Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth. Our boys always get a kick out of certain Proverbs. For example, “It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife” (21:9). “It is better to live in a desert land than with a quarrelsome and fretful woman” (v. 19).
“Why don’t you want to live in a desert?” “Because it’s hot.” “Why don’t you want to live on the corner of the roof?” “It might rain.” “Why don’t you want to live with a quarrelsome wife?” “Because she will make you sad.” “Did you know that some mommies and daddies fight all the time?” “Really?” It struck me as we were talking that my boys had never observed . . . Day 20: ConductProverbs 20:11 Even a child makes himself known by his acts, by whether his conduct is pure and upright. Imagine, if you will, an apple tree in your backyard. The branches, which once boasted lush foliage, are now withered and bare. The sickly trunk leans off to one side. The fruit, once plentiful, has fallen to the ground to rot. Think how foolish it would be to approach that tree with a ladder, a staple gun, and a bucket full of red delicious apples. If you tried to staple those apples to that sickly tree, they would rot within days because the problem is the root and not the fruit (Mark 7:21-23; Luke 6:43-45).
So also, dads, your child’s sinful conduct begins in the heart. You can paint their fruit red as much as you like, but a sinful heart makes that an exercise in futility (Jer. 17:9). Day 19: TemptationProverbs 6:27-29 Can a man carry fire next to his chest and his clothes not be burned? Or can one walk on hot coals and his feet not be scorched? So is he who goes in to his neighbor's wife; none who touches her will go unpunished. Dads, it is good to warn your children about poison oak: “See that oily bush, son. That’s poison oak. Leaves of three, let it be.” Yet what if you weren’t sure what poison oak looked like? You might carelessly walk right into it and lead your children through it also. Or else you might be overprotective: “Don’t touch anything green!” Your children would go through life petrified of nature. Yet even more importantly, you must warn your children against temptation. Warn them what to watch out for and what to do when they are pressured. If you do not instruct them, someone else will.
Solomon, for example, warns his son about . . . Day 18: DiscontentmentProverbs 11:28 Whoever trusts in his riches will fall, but the righteous will flourish like a green leaf. My wife once traveled to Arizona and asked my son what he wanted for a gift.
He replied, “I’d like a snake.” (We were reading Genesis and his favorite Bible character was the serpent.) So I asked him, “You mean like a pretend snake.” “No,” he insisted, “A real snake.” Needless to say he was disappointed (for about three seconds). We all experience disappointment in life, so Paul explains the key of contentment . . . Day 17: DeceptionProverbs 12:22 Lying lips are an abomination to the LORD, but those who act faithfully are his delight. Children often lie for fear of discipline. My son once blamed his brother for drawing with chalk on the neighbor’s driveway, so I had to explain that his deception concerned me more than his colorful scribbles. “Tell me the truth,” I told him, “You won’t be disciplined for your artwork, but only if you lie to me.” Tearfully, my son confessed his sin and sought his brother’s forgiveness.
In biblical times . . . Day 16: SpeechProverbs 18:21 Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits. While reading The Pilgrim’s Progress as a family, we came upon the characters Faithful and Talkative. “What is Talkative’s personality?” one son asked.
“He talks a lot,” I answered, “Do you think that’s good or bad?” Thinking for a moment, he replied noncommittally, “Well, he could be a pastor.” Day 15: LazinessProverbs 6:6 Go to the ant, O sluggard; Consider her ways, and be wise. The first week after bringing home a newborn is always difficult. For one of our boys, my wife woke up every two hours to nurse and woke me up as well to share in her misery. My job was to lift our son from the bassinet, hand him to my wife, then fall asleep until it was time to replace our bundle of joy. (I’m convinced that caring for a newborn is a kind of sleep torture to condition parents for the rigors of childrearing.) After just a few of those evening exercises, I became so disoriented when my wife woke me that I would have to ask, “Coming or going?” Thankfully, after the first couple weeks, my wife realized that I was not an essential cog in the late-night feedings. (I had figured that out much earlier, but was wise enough not to verbalize it.) I slept so soundly during that first night of uninterrupted bliss that I asked her the next morning, “Oh, did he sleep through the night?” My wife was not at all amused.
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