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TLP 623: Biblical Families, Part 11 | the Purpose of Love

3/16/2026

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TLP 623: Biblical Families, Part 11 | the Purpose of Love
Love is not love if it’s not God’s love. There is a divine purpose for our love, and biblical families need to pursue that purpose. Join AMBrewster to learn about the purpose of true love and how your family can achieve it.

Truth.Love.Parent. is a podcast of Truth.Love.Family., an Evermind Ministry.

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Transcript

Introduction

The world is consumed with the idea of purpose. Though it seems important to them, they have a hard time understanding it. Well, Christians have the ability to fully understand and appreciate and live with purpose, so I’m excited to deal with this topic today.

However, if this is your first time with us, I’ll ask that you stop this episode and start with number 613. That’s the beginning of this series and will lay the necessary foundation for what John’s teaching us in his first epistle.

Otherwise, please check out the free notes, transcript, LifeWork, and related resources linked in the description of this episode. Each of them is designed to take your study and growth to a whole new level. For example, our Family Love series is so awesome. It will help your family better understand what the Bible means when it talks about love, but will also teach you to look beyond the English word to truly comprehend what Greek word was being used in the passage and what it meant. 

Also, the Doctrine of Emotions material in the Evermind App is closely tied to this discussion because far too many of us think that love is nothing more than an emotion. Well, that’s not true, and the Doctrine of Emotions material (which normally costs $25) is free to you if you use the link in today’s description.

Alright, let’s jump right in.

Topic

I’d like to assume that—following our little LifeWork chat last week—you were careful to prioritize your prayer, Bible study, and family discipleship this week. These are things God expects from us, so I pray you’re growing in them.

The LifeWork I want to look at before we begin is the one where you were supposed to practice discernment. I encouraged you to do four things. You were to look for opportunities to refute lies with truth. I also said that if you encounter a truth-claim but were unsure what exactly the Bible said about it, that you would study the Scriptures to find out. Then I encouraged you to consider the hermeneutic of the person making the truth-claim . . . especially when they were talking about the Bible.

And lastly, if you took any of those steps, I wanted you to share it with your family members. Now if someone in your family hasn’t had the chance to share one or more of those opportunities, you should pause this session, talk about them, and then restart it.

This is important because we absolutely have to be practicing with what we’re learning. It’s never good enough to just hear truth. James tells us that it’s worthless to be a hearer of the Word if we’re not going to be a doer of the Word. The doer of the Word will be blessed.

Okay, so let’s read today’s passage. I John 4:7-14 says, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has beheld God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us. 13 By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit. 14 We have beheld and bear witness that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world.”

As I’ve observed many times before, there is so much deep, beautiful truth in these verses. We could take so much time to unpack each one, but this study is designed to be an overview. I mention this because I don’t want you to think we’re digging as deep as we could. I also want you to understand why I don’t touch on every beautiful reality before moving on to the next point.

Okay, with that . . .

1. The Purpose of Love is God.

There are so many statements in the Bible about God’s character and actions. The words “God is” are followed by so many beautiful descriptors. For example, in II Chronicles we read “God is gracious and compassionate,” and in I Samuel 10:7 we find “God is with you.” Later in the New Testament there are passages like John 3:33, “God is true,” and I Corinthians 1:9, “God is faithful.”

Now, I don’t want us to get lost in the grammar, but it’s important for us to recognize that most of the descriptors we just read are adjectives. In the statement, God is gracious, “gracious” is a predicate adjective. The same is technically true for the prepositional phrase “with you.” And most of the times we see “God is” in the Bible, the next word or words are adjectival modifiers. They describe and modify our understanding of the subject—which in this case is God.

Rarely do we find predicate nominatives that follow “God is.” Those are nouns instead of adjectives. And I’ll tell you why this is important. The adjectives speak to God’s character. The nouns speak to God’s composition, His identity, His very existence. 

For example, in Mark 12:29, Jesus proclaims, “God is one Lord.” This doesn’t tell us about what He’s doing or even what He’s like. It tells us what He is at His core. In John 4:24 we learn from the lips of Jesus that “God is spirit.” This again is pointing us to an element of His person, not a character quality.

And I say all of this because of what John tells us in verse 8 of this passage. John doesn’t say that “God is loving.” John says matter of factly that . . .

A. God is Love.

This is staggering. This is beautiful. This is so important. 

The fact that God is love means that true biblical love is actually the closest we can get to godliness. We see this truth in II Peter 1:5-7. If you listen to our Evidences of Spiritual Life series, you’ll understand the significance of the fact that Peter explains how love is the quintessential apex of godliness and spiritual maturity.

This means that when our hope is fulfilled, and we are like Him because we can see Him as He is, our entire existence will be completely and fully and utterly consumed by the expressions of love.

Now, before we move on, we also have to identify what this passage is not saying. This passage is not claiming that love is God. 

The world believes two lies about love. First, they believe that there is nothing more important than love. Love has become the god of this generation. And this is a huge problem because . . . Second, they create love in their own image. They imagine that love is categorically accepting people for whatever they may be. It’s affirming. Or it’s nothing but sexuality. 

They have made their own desires their god. They have defined love as they want . . . they say ridiculous things like “love is love” as if that actually means anything . . . and they claim that nothing is more important than how they define love. They are trying to become god.

But love is not God. True biblical love is godly, but it’s not God. God is God. God is loving, yes, but in that love, He’s also wrathful and righteous and holy and King and Lord and Judge. His love is defined by the entirety of who He is . . . not the other way around.

And all of this is extremely important because it points to the ultimate purpose of love. It’s not our feelings. It’s not marriage. It’s not getting someone to respond to you in a certain way. The purpose of love is actually God. He is love and all love flows from and is due to Him.

B. Love is from God.

We cannot love if God does not first love us. Unbelievers are only capable of tasting the immaculate beauty of love. By God’s common grace, we get to feel affection and attraction, and we can even sometimes desire someone else’s good . . . unfortunately, though, even when we do this, we do it for our own purposes and glory. 

And we actually praise God that He pours common grace on unbelievers, or this world and our existence would be far worse than it is.

But the point is that without a saving relationship with God in the light of His righteousness, we cannot love anyone. Now, if you’re listening to this, and you know you’re unsaved, please hear what I’m saying. That thing that is so important to you . . . love . . . feeling it and giving it . . . it’s impossible for you to ever experience the real thing. It’s like never being able to eat a real cookie. Instead, you get to chew on a piece of plastic that looks like a cookie and has some artificial cookie flavor rubbed on it, but that’s it.

And the greatest thing we can do with our love is also unreachable by unbelievers.

C. Love is for God.

It is a beautiful gift that we get to love others, but—ultimately—God gives us love so that we can pour it back on Him.

Now, some of the verses we just read may seem to contradict this truth, so I’m going to expand it out in the next point.

But allow me to tie up this point before we move on. We spoke earlier about the preeminence of love in a biblical family. It must be there, and it must be alive. And then we talked about the consequences of love in a biblical family. We saw the joy and peace and happiness and maturity that comes from truly loving each other. But we must not get lost in the consequences. The purpose of the love in our family must be God not a peaceful home life. Biblical family love must flow from Him and back to Him because He is love, and He deserves our love. 

We’re not being loving if we’re “loving” for our own purposes. It’s not ultimately about what we feel. It’s not about what we want. It’s not about trying to get someone else to do or be something. We need to love each other because God. That’s it; that’s the whole sentence—because God. Because He loves us and wants us to love others . . . that’s why we love.

So, what does this look like in practical application?

2. The Purpose of Love is Salvation.

Our passage for today repeatedly illustrates that. I’m going to share the three subpoints and then show what this needs to mean for our families.

A. God’s love results in people being born again.

“Everyone who loves has been born of God.”

B. God’s love results in the dead being raised to life.

“By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him.”

C. God’s love results in the righteous One taking the sins of the unrighteous ones.

“In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.”

If you think that those are all just the same point repeated in different ways, you’re not wrong. So why does John repackage this truth for us over and over? Because there’s nothing more important in the whole universe than a person being born again!

Without God’s love, He never would have created us, He never would have taught Adam and Eve how to live perfect lives, He never would have given humanity a second chance, and He never would have sent His Son to die in our place. 

The purpose of God’s love was and is the salvation of His people. And this has two massive implications for the children of God.

First, you must be born again. God’s whole purpose is to receive glory to Himself. He is worth it. And the greatest way He receives that glory is by pouring His love on us so that we can pour that love back on Him. 

I could easily argue that the very point of your existence is to be born again into eternal life and love God. That’s it. You must be born again, and if you’re not, will you please meditate deeply on what we’ve discussed today? God loves you. God’s love seeks to save you from your sins and the death you deserve, to give you life and light and the ability to experience and share true love. Why do you reject Him?

But . . .

Second, true love evangelizes. God’s love was poured on you so that you could be a Christian, doesn’t it make sense that the love you can now experience and share would desire for other people to become Christians?

We ought to love one another. That means that we ought to pursue God’s best interest for everyone in our lives . . . and that means that their salvation needs to be our highest priority.

If there is someone in your home who isn’t saved, they’re an unbeliever, and you do not love them if you aren’t sharing the Gospel with them. You don’t love them if you’re not trying to help them see the glory of God and how much they need Him. You don’t love them if you play with them and hang out with them and watch movies with them and do chores with them, but—in the end—keep from them the truth they need to escape a Christ-less eternity and be able to worship God for all time.

Your family unit can only ever be a full and true biblical family when everyone in your family is born again and pursuing biblical love.

But we need to understand this as well, just because everyone in your family professes to be a Christian doesn’t mean that your biblical love is no longer all about God.

3. The Purpose of Love is Discipleship.

Verse seven read, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.” Being born of God isn’t the end goal. We’re to move forward in that saving life and know God better. We talked before about how this is a comprehensive and intimate word. We don’t just know about God and what He did, we’re getting to know Him better and better in a real, relational way.

We call this process sanctification. We also call it discipleship. 

A. Truly loving someone is going to focus on them better knowing God and loving Him.

The words “love one another” are all over this passage because Jesus knew that biblical love for each other is the necessary consequence of being a disciple of Christ.

B. Truly loving God is the process by which we become more righteous.

In verse 12 John says, “if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.” Earlier in I John 2:5 we read, “but whoever keeps His word, truly in him the love of God has been perfected.”

God’s love in us isn’t just so that we can lead others to Him or help His people mature, it’s so that we mature. The more we love, the more mature we’re becoming. But loving God and others will require that we live in the light of His righteousness. Whoever keeps His Word is the person in whom the love of God has been perfected. 

Now, God is not saying that unless you’re sinlessly perfect, you’re not a Christian. He’s saying that you’re in process of being perfected. You’re growing and maturing. 

Verse 13 told us, “By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit.” There are two important ideas that also speak to our personal discipleship. One is that we are abiding in Him. We’re striving to remain in the light and live in His love. Two is that we have the Holy Spirit. We talked recently about what it is to have the Spirit. It’s part of our responsibility to be salt and light, but it’s also the way God illumines our minds to understand His Word that He wants us to keep.

Conclusion

My friends, the purpose of God’s love in our families is three-fold. God gives us His love so that we can love Him as we ought. The process of loving Him will result in us sharing the Gospel with those who are not yet born again, and as we keep His Word and know Him better, we will grow in our discipleship . . . and—consequently—love better.

So, let’s read our passage again with these truths in mind. I John 4:7-14, “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 The one who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11 Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has beheld God at any time; if we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us. 13 By this we know that we abide in Him and He in us, because He has given us of His Spirit. 14 We have beheld and bear witness that the Father has sent the Son to be the Savior of the world.”

Here is your LifeWork for this week.

1. Meditate on I John 4:15-21 at least two times this week.

We only have three more of these sessions and our family Bible study through I John will be complete. Part of this process has been to help you develop godly habits like reading the Bible, praying, and living the truth you’re learning. If after eleven weeks, you haven’t yet built the habit of meditating on the Word at least two times a week, I hope you’ll take the next few weeks seriously. 

Of course, meditating on God’s Word only two times a week may be a good start, but like we need to eat and drink and sleep every day in order to grow physically, we should be meditating on the Scriptures every day to grow spiritually.

Remember, meditating isn’t only reading. You’re trying to know God better, and—as James pointed out—that means you’re going to be doing what you’re learning. So, you need to understand it the way God intended so that you can make changes to your life as necessary.

2. Ask God to show you how you can better love Him and your family.

Now, the answer to this won’t come in a vision or miraculous experience. It will happen in a few ways, though. The Holy Spirit may convict you when you’re not being loving. Also, as you read the Bible, there are so many examples of how God wants you to love Him and others. And your spiritual leaders have also been put into your lives to help you better know how to love each other. As you ask God to teach you to love better, your mind will be turned on and looking for the ways He’s teaching you.

3. Be part of your family’s spiritual life and growth this week.

If you are a Christian, God definitely wants you sharing the gospel with your unsaved family members and talking with them about their doubts and answering their questions. But He also has a list of 31 “one anothers” that describe what your relationship with the other Christians in your family should be like. It includes loving and encouraging and edifying, but it also includes reproving and rebuking and admonishing and singing biblical truth to each other and so many more. God longs for you to take the discipleship of your family personally and passionately. 

And—as always—you could love your friends and church family by sharing this devotional with them. And you can love this ministry by helping us raise money this year. We’re a 501(c)(3) nonprofit and we can pay our bills only when those of you who have benefited from our free resources donate to the ministry. You can find a link in the description to learn more. 

And you can also feel free to email us at [email protected] or leave a voicemail at (828) 423-0894 if there’s any way we can help your family be a more biblical family.

And then join us next time as we talk about the sting of being a biblical family. Like a parent who warns that a hot stove can burn us, the Lord has an important warning for our family.

I’ll see you then.
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